Saturday, September 15, 2012

Their Little Soldier

~Rest In Peace, Little Guy. The World Misses You.~

Colton Micheal Palmer
May 13, 2012 - January 27, 2013

He fought a long, hard battle with a smile on his face everyday. He will never be forgotten.

The Beautiful Family! Daddy, Colton, and Mommy

Their little soldier is this cute guy in the middle! Colton Michael. He was born six weeks early and weighed in at just five pounds on May 13, 2012. Greatest Mother's Day Gift Ever! And as happy as any parent would be with a new child, it hasn't always been easy. Colton was born with a disorder called Biliary Atresia (Bill-E-ary Uh-TREE-sha). Biliary Atresia is a condition in which the bile ducts in the liver do not work correctly, causing the bile to stop flowing correctly, which causes a backup of bile. Bile is necessary for the digestion of foods, and to keep the pH level ideal for the small intestines. In his four months, he has gone through more things in his life than anyone I can think has gone through in years. He has had multiple surgeries, IV's and antibiotics, and lots of time spent in hospitals. With lots of family and friends hoping and praying for him, he has more support than his little heart will ever know.

Colton's condition was noticed in just the first few days of his life. He was extremely jaundice, so his doctor did a liver biopsy. This is what helped to diagnose him.  At three weeks old, Colton underwent the Kasai procedure. The Kasai procedure is a surgery in which the small intestines are attached to the liver directly to help with the flow of bile. Colton's bilirubin levels were multiple times higher than they were supposed to be. Normal bilirubin levels are between 0 to 0.3 and 1.9mg/dL. Colton's levels were at 6.4mg/dL. The first month of his life, he stayed at a hospital on antibiotics through IV's in his arm. They eventually moved the IV to his head, because his arm was getting really red.
The Kasai operation

All Smiles!
His first month of life was spent at the hospital. During this time, he had the two surgeries: Biopsy and Kasai procedure. He was home until last month, when he was readmitted because of a rise in his bilirubin levels. He needed his antibiotics again. Two weeks later, he was sent home with the antibiotics. About two weeks ago, he went back because of a fever, and to see why his levels went back up. He had another surgery on September 13, to double check the procedure and make sure scar tissue was not blocking anything. If there was nothing blocking it, Colton would need a liver transplant. After the surgery, this family was told that there was, in fact, scar tissue blockage, and after it was removed, there was bile flow.
This is GREAT news, because that means that four-month-old Colton Michael does not need a liver transplant!

The most amazing thing through all of this (Besides the countless amounts of family and friends supporting this family) is that Colton never lost that beautiful smile of his. Even from the very beginning, he was always smiling, and he always puts a smile on everyone's face around him. He's a strong fighter, and he has more supporters and fans than he'll ever know what to do with. :)

I think I'm his biggest fan! (Next to his parents, of course!)

*All photos of Colton and his family are courtesy of Chris and Stephanie Palmer*

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

I Got An A!

So I have noticed that the past couple of posts have been sad, albeit important, ones. Today, or rather tonight, I am going to change that. :)

I just got out of my math class. I'm sitting at the college right now doing absolutely nothing but blogging. I will probably have facebook up before I finish this blog, just so I can get ideas about what to write.
I did my speech this morning after working on it all of twenty minutes Monday. I got an A! There was a video that he recorded, too. It's me looking like a dork. He said I talk too fast, and that my movement was a little crazy. I should probably look at the audience a bit more instead of at my paper. And I need to stop saying "um."

I don't know if it has sound on it. He says it does, but all the computers at the college have the sound turned off, so I haven't officially heard it yet. If it doesn't have sound, someone should let me know, so I can let Mr. Gernand know that I can't judge my voice or anything because of the "no audio" problem. And yes, I said judge myself. We have to evaluate ourselves on how we think we did on our speeches. And he says we cannot be too harsh on the other speakers or ourselves. ..Yeah right..

I don't even know if the video will play. I just posted it so everyone can see what a dork I am in class. By the way, we were giving speeches about ourselves; pretty much just introducing ourselves to the class. We've only been in class for like three weeks now, but for only two days a week. And the second Monday was a holiday, so really for only five days. We're still getting to know each other. I sit at the same desk every day, though. That's my little corner. I can get to the door when I need to, or I can hide if I need to.

Actually, I think I need to  find a new blurb, too. Blurb. A current event, or news article, that is approximately fifteen to twenty seconds long to tell the class. It's supposed to be some type of "not be scared of being at the podium in front of people" exercise. I'm really not sure how well it works. I can tell myself that it's only for twenty seconds and just talk like I'm a news anchor and get it over with. Everyone else still does the whole "jittery" thing. I'm not saying I'm not nervous, because I am, and my body language shows it (Look at the video), but I can get up there, say what I need to say, and get over it before it becomes a problem.

There is a girl in there who is so ... outgoing? That may not be the right word. She's just always the first to volunteer or the first to say something. She's really sweet. I talked to her in the lunch line the other day. She's nice. She's just a lot braver than I would be if that were me in that situation. I won't be the first to volunteer for a speech. I usually wait until Mr. Gernand starts doing his "Speech going once, twice, going, going, going, going.... " for a few seconds, and THEN I will stand up and get up there.

Just get it over with... I tell myself.
..Please. As if it's that easy.
He's really an easy teacher to pass. He's really weird himself. He will make funny noises and stuff to try and lighten the tension in the room. It's cool, though. He talks about how he's a speech instructor and STILL hates being in front of people speaking.

And reading from the book doesn't suck like with most teachers. He will read it kindof from our point of view. Not word for word, and he gets to the point rather quickly. I think the longest we have spent on a chapter is about thirty minutes.

Today is Deralynn's official twenty-month day. She is four months away from being two years old. Do you realize how FAST that is? I can't believe she is already two! She's starting to talk, and she learned how to jump. She's also learning how to nod her head 'yes.' This girl is seriously my whole world. I want to go home and see her, but she is at her GiGi's right now. I'm thinking about maybe going to get her tonight and keeping her at home with me, but at the same time, Trey and I will have a night alone. And I would say that we might end up baby-making, but I'm already doing that, so that's off the list. We could probably watch movies. DANGIT!
I forgot to take the Redbox's back. Jeeze. They're going to be like $20 each by the time I get them turned back in. I don't know why Trey rented them right before he went to drill. He usually watches them, and I end up going to bed, because I don't feel like staying up watching a movie that I'm sure I will see later in life when I'm not so damn tired. Meh. To each their own. Anyway, it's like 40F in the library, my fingers are frozen, and I'm officially out of things to write about. I will blog again eventually.

I really miss my internet. I can do this at home with internet. Without it, I have to get my fix whenever I am at the college or Grandma's house. Ugh.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

11 Years Later...

Do you remember where you were when it happened?
Do you remember what you were doing?
Do you remember?

September 11, 2001 - I was in the fifth grade. We had just switched classes, and I walked into my English class to find the teacher crying. Crying? Seriously, what teacher cries at school? I remember thinking "If something is bothering her, she really shouldn't be at school. She should go home and deal with her stuff before coming to school all teary-eyed." I had no idea what she was crying about. However, I do remember the conversation in class that we had that morning. I remember turning on Channel 1 News for the school.

Teacher: "Some of you probably have no idea what is happening this morning. Some of you are going home early today."
Class: .... -silence-
Teacher: "This is history. Watch." -Turns on Channel 1 News.-

And then there it was. I was too young to realize what it was. All I saw was smoke. Lots of smoke. And a building on fire. I didn't know what the significance of the building was. I didn't even know what a terrorist was. How was I supposed to know that we were under attack and that the entire country was at a heightened awareness? How was I supposed to know that this was something to be afraid of? I seriously thought it was just a really tall building on fire.

I'll be honest with you. I don't think it ever really sank in about how serious an event it was.

So many people...
Children, even.
Not many, but enough. Too many.

And the death toll continues to climb, eleven years later. From Lung Diseases that are directly related to breathing in the dust and broken glass and ashes from the collapse of the towers.

That day was just horrible. Really. I seriously could talk about it all day, but I don't really need to. You understand.

Sunday, September 9, 2012


April 19, 1995

I was four years old. I'm not going to give a history lesson about what happened on this day, but I am going to tell you how it makes me feel.

When I was thirteen years old, my mom was living in Oklahoma. My siblings and I were with her for most of that summer. While we were there, we went and visited this "Oklahoma City Bombing Memorial," of which I had never heard of.

My first impression of the memorial was that it was absolutely beautiful...
I kept thinking that the shallow water was so clear, and the ducks that were floating in it were so cute! (I was thirteen and had no idea what I was witnessing.)

We kept walking through the memorial, and there were the two walls on each end of the pond. One says "9:01" and the other one says "9:03" -- The start and end of the tragedy.

I remember the chairs. One for each victim. 168 innocent people, not including the three fetuses of pregnant women. (I still think they should have had their own chairs. They're people too.) I remember the tree. The Survivor Tree.

The building across the street with this message painted on the side:

Team 5
We search for the truth.
We seek justice.
The courts require it.
The victims cry for it.
And GOD demands it!

It's amazing how one thing can hit you so hard. Even when you had no idea.

The chairs, the walls, the pond..
And then the one that really hit me. I cried.

The fence.

There are so many memorial items on this fence. From birthday cards, to American flags, to teddy bears. That is the hardest part. You look at those teddy bears and you just know that they are for those children. Some of those children were just beginning life. Three months old in some cases. How can that NOT bother the person that did this? How is it that he was okay with himself?

This fence. It hits hard. 

I believe that the reason it bothers me so bad is because I now have a child of my own, and one on the way. And when I think about it, there were children that were her age when this happened that didn't make it. There were women in the building that were pregnant like I am, and didn't make it. I know there is nothing I can do now that it has already happened, but it really does just ...
There's a feeling that it brings forth from within me. I don't know what that feeling is. I don't know if I will ever be able to describe it, or explain it, or even understand it for myself.

There are a lot of things about this day that bothers me. There are a lot of things about other tragedies like this that bother me.
Forced Death. I hate it. Someone is forced to die (murdered, assassinated, killed by surrounding damage)...
Things like that.
I hate it.

September 11, 2001.
Charles Manson.
Timothy McVeigh.
Oklahoma City Bombing.
Waco Siege.

I could go on and on. Seriously.

I hate it.

And now that I have thrown my feelings into a webpage that very few people will even look at, I am going to try to distract myself with happy things.
I'm going to sit in my bed tonight and think about everyone who has been victimized by these cruel hateful events...


Moody Goose.

Very moody. Have a problem with it? Tough.

So Fall 2012 Schedule goes as follows:

Monday/Wednesday 8AM:       ENGL1301 with Lewis
Monday/Wednesday 9:35AM:  SPCH1315 with Gernand
Monday/Wednesday 5PM:        MATH0408 with Reid
Tuesday 6PM:                            TECA1354 with Webster

English 1301 is Composition and Rhetoric. Speech 1315 is Fundamentals of Speech. Math 0408 is Intermediate Algebra. TECA1354 is Child Growth and Development.

I don't know the actual name of the TECA part of it, but I know that getting into that class is a little more difficult than usual because if they don't have enough students sign up, they will cancel the class, leaving me with more work I have to do on my schedule. I am getting financial aid, which is the only way I can actually afford the classes. Without financial aid I wouldn't be in classes at all, and I would be sitting on my butt doing nothing all day. Sucks, really.

I still have the homework to do for every one of these classes. I've just been too lazy this weekend to do it. I really don't want to get off my butt and get up to finish it. There's even a quiz tomorrow in math. Ugh.

Baby is giving me hell today. I really don't know what I did but Baby is NOT happy with me. My stomach hurts and I'm trying not to throw up everywhere...
I'm not used to pregnancy being this difficult. It was smooth-sailing with Deralynn. I didn't have any issues at all with the pregnancy with her. I remember the first ultrasound I ever got. She really was just a little peanut. I still have the ultrasound pictures. I actually still have the HPT from her, too... Somewhere...

I would love to continue to write for hours on end. Days, even. But life is calling, and I have to answer it. Meh. Another one of them days...


Saturday, September 8, 2012

Drill Weekend

I hate the Army. It's really a drag when I have to be by myself for an entire weekend while Trey is out dealing with the stupid shit of the Army. It really is a waste of time. Especially now that he makes more money in one day at work than an entire weekend for drill. It sucks. Seriously.  

I hate drill.